Groom Demands Bride Not Wear White Since She’s Not ‘Pure’

A woman on Reddit revealed her fiancé is demanding she not wear white to their wedding as she is not a virgin and it would be deceiving to their guests.

“I’ve been doing most of the wedding planning but my fiancé, let’s just call him Ryan, will give his input here and there. So about a month ago Ryan out of nowhere said he was talking to some of his co-workers and thinks that I shouldn’t wear a white dress. This was totally weird to me. Ryan is a very artistic guy, so I figured this was more about how the photos would turn out or something along those lines, but I’m set on wearing white,” she wrote via Reddit.

After a few weeks passed, she picked out and paid for her wedding dress.

“Ryan again came to me very annoyed. He asked to see the dress I picked, but I said no because I wanted it to be a surprise for our wedding day. He asked me to at least tell him what color it was, and when I said white, he threw a fit,” she continued.

The bride-to-be was confused why it was a “big deal,” as “almost everyone wears white on their wedding day.”

“When I asked him what color he thought I’d be wearing, he told me I should wear red. Again, this was super weird to me. I asked him why I would wear red to our wedding, and he told me that brides only wear white when they are pure,” she detailed.

The woman noted she and Ryan started dating when they were both young and he “was a virgin” when they met. Initially, Ryan was “insecure” about her being with another man prior to him, but she thought he had moved past that.

“He went to his mom about all of this thinking she would convince me but she’s on my side. So [two] nights ago, Ryan, his mom and I stood in our living room and argued about my sex life being shown in a dress,” she recalled, adding that Ryan started “crying” when his mom pointed out he was also no longer a virgin.

Afterward, Ryan doubled down, telling his bride-to-be that wearing white would “be deceiving all of the guests and that it is different for guys.”

“This all has honestly made me question even marrying this man. I don’t know if it’s just because everything is so fresh but I’m really disgusted by him. He’s not even religious so I know this is just about him still thinking about me losing my virginity at 18 before I even knew him,” the woman added.

In the comments, Reddit users rallied behind the bride, with many suggesting she reconsider going through with the wedding.

“I love how all this time they’ve been having sex too and now all of a sudden she has to wear red? What about him? If he’s f—ing her he also lost his virginity before getting married so shouldn’t he wear red as well? What kind of idiots is he talking to that would enforce their to-be wife to wear red to signify she’s not a virgin? Girl, run,” one person wrote.

“I’ve been to so many weddings, I couldn’t possibly count. Big family & know a lot of people, I guess. I literally don’t know 1 bride who has worn a red wedding dress. In fact.. only one of those weddings even used red in their bridal party. Not to mention.. aside from my LDS (mormon) family and friends… not one virgin. Oh and they all wore white. Many of those, in churches. Wear YOUR white dress,” another commented.

“The whole thing just sounds blindly conservative/traditionalist to me. He’s too young to have formed any sophisticated opinions on his own about this topic, and that tells me he is probably more immature (as opposed to proactively misogynistic). My guess is that he is someone who is just on some type of ‘moral autopilot’ who needs to have his consciousness raised. But either way, it would give me serious pause,” someone else shared.